Big Girl

Today Emma has officially went all day without an accident. We were even out and about a lot today and she said on the way home "Pee Mama" so I said "Hold it baby, we are almost home" She said "Home? OK" LOL> And when we got home the pull up was DRY and she went pee. YAY EMMA. Time to go get some big girl undies.... while trying to avoid the Dora ones, lol.

As I am sitting here typing Adam is talking about Emma. It is cute. He said "We should trim her hair" I say "No way" He said "No?" LOL.... end of that discussion, then he moves on to wonder what she is going to look like when she gets older. As a parent of three, I can say, time flies by so fast, she will be 8 tomorrow. I remember thinking the same thing about Tyler, and Leah. Where has the time gone? I remember Tyler being this energetic, chubby, 30 lb, 2 yr old, like it was yesterday. Now he is 8, going into 3rd grade, and is tall and super skinny. He looks just like his toddler days, minus those chubby cheeks and a couple feet taller, lol. I decided today as well, that Leah is too big. I can not believe "Baby Leah" (as she is referred to a lot) is going into Kinder!!!

My heart aches for many reasons. I can't stop time, I want to go back and relive some things, not miss out on other things. I don't want my kids to grow up, I don't want them to realize what this world is really like. I don't want them to face racism, violence, hurt, heartbreak, poverty, reality. I want to put them under my arms and hold them forever. I look back and remember where I was and highlights of my life at certain ages. I had a rough adolecense, so I know my kids won't see a lot of things I did that young, but I can not help but cringe. How can I prepare them for life? How do I know if what I am doing is what I am supposed to? How can I prepare MYSELF for them growing up? I do not think there is any specific answer to these questions. I think we do the best we can and do what we think is best and pray it works. Please, Lord, please guide US. That is all I can do is do my best and pray.